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The clever punchline gives it away for what it is, as can captain stabbing be more readily seen in this bare-bones version found on a humor Website: A man is driving home late one night and is feeling very horny. As he is passing a pumpkin patch, his mind starts to wander. He captain stabbing thinks to himself, you know a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there is no one around here for miles. He pulls over to the side of the road, picks out a nice juicy looking pumpkin, cuts the appropriate size hole in it, and begins to screw the pumpkin. After a while he is really into it, and doesn't notice the police car pulling up. The cop walks over and says, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?" The man looks at the cop in complete horror, thinks fast and says, "A pumpkin? Is it midnight already?"
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